Theosophus Grollblunken Dares to Smile

Theosophus Grollblunken was known to be a thoroughly disagreeable person. Unsavory elements of gloom, misery, and all-around dourness formed the repugnant framework of his forbidding character. Even on a good day, which for Theosophus Grollblunken was a rare occasion, he was certain to be in an utterly foul mood, and on a bad day, which was more frequent, no one could approach him without putting themselves in danger.

Because Theosophus Grollblunken was such an unpleasant fellow, he did not have any close friends, or indeed, any friends at all. He actually had only one acquaintance: Silas Dunderslupp, a sour man who was nearly as disagreeable as Theosophus Grollblunken himself. Once a week, always at the same time, Theosophus Grollblunken and Silas Dunderslupp would meet in a downtown park. They would sit on a bench for an hour or so, and complain together.

"Life is a meaningless heap of petty annoyances!" Theosophus Grollblunken would say, loudly.

"Yes, I concur with you totally, life is a meaningless heap of petty annoyances!" Silas Dunderslupp would say, strongly.

"The world in which we are living is a lousy pit of sickening filth!" Theosophus would proclaim, harshly.

"Yes, you are absolutely correct in your opinion, the world in which we are living is a lousy pit of sickening filth!" Silas would avow, firmly.

"The entire cosmos and all that it contains is nothing more than a vile expanse of infinite rottenness!" Theosophus would announce, vehemently.

"Yes, unquestionably, the entire cosmos and all that it contains is nothing more than a vile expanse of infinite rottenness!" Silas would declare, fervently.

Every week, Theosophus Grollblunken and Silas Dunderslupp sat on the same bench in the same park, and had the same ill-tempered conversation, with only slight variations of general peevishness. One day, however, the usual pattern of their discussion took a different turn.

"I hate everyone and everything!" Theosophus Grollblunken said.

"Yes, I hate everyone and everything, too!" Silas Dunderslupp said.

"I do like little bunnies, though," Theosophus said.

"What did you just say?" Silas asked, not believing the happy words that Theosophus had voiced.

"I said, I do like little bunnies," Theosophus replied. "I also like flowers and sunshine."

"I thought that you hated everyone and everything," Silas said.

"I changed my mind," Theosophus said, and then he dared to smile.

"What is happening to your face?" Silas asked, in an angry tone of surprise and condemnation.

"I am smiling," Theosophus replied. "I find it to be an enjoyable feeling. You should try it."

Silas Dunderslupp got up from the bench and departed, muttering an expression of deep loathing as he slowly walked away. He and Theosophus Grollblunken never spoke to each other again, but Theosophus continued to smile, sometimes as much as twice in one day.